ignore this tbh

42 days.

I'm nearing the halfway mark in my adventure abroad, and it's slowly starting to seem less like an exciting journey of self-discovery and more like a meticulous balance between eagerness and exhaustion. You see all these people posting their photos on Facebook showing their trips to Ireland, France, Germany, and the like. I personally came to London for London itself. I've gained so much knowledge about the city and the people and the transport and the way of life for commuters. But what you see in pictures is only 20 percent of it.

The truth of the matter is that I'm tired.

Some days I don't want to get out of bed because I can't wake up to the sound of my family messing about in the kitchen. That's another 20 percent of my days. Another 30 comes from me actually wanting to get up and explore and go places that I've only dreamed about. And yet, I haven't left London.

Studying abroad seems like an incredible opportunity - and it is. I don't want to diminish its excitement for people who think this is something they'd want to do in the future, but the reality of the situation is that it's not all butterflies and rainbows all the time. I'm past the adrenaline rush and now I'm suffering from a severe crash in energy and motivation. It's life, I guess.

I have the next week off for Reading Week and I'm going to try to recharge myself and power through the next 6 weeks before I'm headed home. I'm going to the White Cliffs of Dover on Saturday; hopefully I'll return with a better outlook and a refreshed mindset.

ak x